[The Listserve] Shame, sleep, thoughts, plans, loves, sprints.
Everyone has a story, and everyone learned things along the way that they wish they had known (or known the very real importance of) at the outset of their story.
If you take *nothing* else from this email, take this:
* Never let shame dictate your life. Never suffer in silence. Never push people away without letting them understand what's happening. Allow yourself to be vulnerable and to show those vulnerabilities to people around you, trust that they will understand and accept their help. You will be surprised by their kindness. And they need your help too.
If you'll stay with me for a few more:
* Try your hardest to get enough sleep, and to sleep during hours that work decently with the rest of society. Being awake when noone else is and sleeping when noone else is causes distance and isolation. Being constantly tired saps the happiness from everything and causes lack of discipline to make even the smallest choices correctly, let alone bigger ones.
* Let the frequency of your thoughts guide you. If you think about something constantly, then you should probably act on it in some way. A challenge is figuring out what that action should be, but a thought that keeps returning will often require a resolution of some kind.
* If there's something you want to do, pick a date for it. If you have to postpone it for whatever reason that's perfectly fine, but giving it a decently honest shot at doing it on that date is infinitely better than just letting time pass by.
* Make some short lists of things you love, and keep them in a safe place. A few foods, a few songs, a few books, a few movies, a few people, a few places, a few thoughts. Return to these lists from time to time. Revise them. Seek their contents. Sometimes you'll feel like nothing is enjoyable, and maybe even doubt that anything ever was. That's when you need them the most.
* If you are able, make sure to raise your pulse once in a while. I'm not telling you to run for miles on end, enough others are telling you that. No, I'm saying on your way to the supermarket and no one is around, just sprint for 30 metres. It feels good.
I'm running out of space, so I'll finish with some short clichés that are true to me:
Meditate. One of my favourite quotes is "To the mind that is still, the whole universe surrenders". I'm not a spiritual person, but it reminds me of what we're capable of when we're calm. Find people to love, who love you, and spend your life loving them. Keep a truly honest diary. It helps thought processes more than you can imagine.
Lots of people find themselves in situations that they imagine they will one day be "on the other side of", and whether that's the right way to look at it or not, I'm no different. Sometimes, it will feel like a fight. Sometimes, you might feel it's not worth it, that there's more sorrow than joy and that there always will be. Sometimes, you'll feel like you haven't put up a fight in so long you've forgotten how to. But you haven't forgotten.
Make damn sure you keep fighting. There are things to enjoy.
I'd really love to get your lists of things you love most. If you want to talk about those or anything else really, please don't hesitate to reach out at email@example.com
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