[The Listserve] Greg's Rules for Greg
A few years ago I started making rules for myself because I wanted to help future Greg make the best decisions he can. These rules apply only to myself.
Greg's Rules for Greg
1. If you're debating between shaving and not shaving you should always shave. Clean is classy
2. Always take the Sunday flight home, nothing that great ever happens Sunday night and flying home early Monday crushes your week
3. Don't drink a muscle milk when you're drunk
4. The feeling of regret is always worse than the feeling of rejection
5. Always wear a costume on Halloween and make sure it's good
6. No one cares about your fantasy team but you
7. Always check the volume of your headphones before you press play. It's the worst way to start your day.
8. The opening song of the lion king makes for an epic alarm clock
9. Smile every time you enter a room
10. Know the crowd, especially when it comes to pulling out your penis
11. Try to eliminate the word “but” from your vocabulary
12. When out with a lady always offer to pay for dinner
13. After eating a massive meal don't immediately take a really hot bubble bath
14. If you're generous, generosity will find you
15. If it’s 3:30am and your drunk then it’s not a good time to take a shot of espresso
16. We're all in this together
17. You can't be something to everyone but you can be everything to someone
18. If you stay out late drinking on a weeknight, make sure that you get a very good night sleep the next night.
19. Always finish eating at least one hour before doing a Bikram yoga class
20. The first time you ever have an issue with someone, give them the benefit of the doubt
21. When in doubt buy the point
22. Give and ask for guidance, not feedback. We all crave guidance.
23. It's always better to over dress than under dress. Additionally make sure you know what's proper attire for important events
24. Understand why someone holds a view before disagreeing with it
25. When I'm not feeling great I need to always ask myself when the last time I had sex/jerked off is and if it's more than 2 days do that and reevaluate
26. When renting a new home or apartment always check the vents for mold/dust and inquire about the last time they were cleaned, and that the filters in the HVAC were changed
27. Don't play the "snooze" game. Set your alarm and get up when it goes off. Quit with the 5 more minutes bullshit.
29. When you’re done with work for the day, close all tabs and programs on your computer. It’s no fun waking up to a million things trying to grab your attention
30. Pei Wei smells really good but the food sucks
31. Have a set routine for the first 2.5 hours of your day. It makes you happy and productive